4-28-25

It's only been a few days that I've been with my partner, and I think it would be a good idea to have a conversation on what we both expect to get from this. I've been told that communication is key, so I want to start that off as early as possible. I've noticed that my paranoid tendencies are coming out again. I catch myself analyzing texts and relaize that it's not as deep as I want to try and make it. I need to learn to shutdown that kind of thinking when I know that it's unreasonable and nonsensical. I look foward to spending more time with them. I won't have as much time to with exams coming up though, but I can try and make time.

4-25-25

I've started doing more activites outside the house, like I said I would last entry. I'm part of a DnD club and we have a session today. I've also been going out with friends more. Just last week I went skating with some friends. It's been really great having my self take charge of my social life and make decisions to leave the house. Yesterday I went out to the park with the person I like. We wandered around off the path into the trees and walked along the train tracks. It was an honeslty amazing experience, just walking, following the wood and metal. We stopped and ate some honey suckle flowers and I braided their hair. I was too nervous to tell them I liked them on the walk or in the car so I texted them after they dropped me off. We're officially dating and I'm so so happy. I'm so glad about how much I've grown as a person as compared to freshman year. This blog has helped me document how I'm feeling, and I hope to have good news to report next time I enter something here.

2-8-25

First blog post of the new year! I'm currently hiding in the bathroom of the debate competition I'm at. I do congressional debate and I had a bill in the finals, unfortunately I didn't break so I can't debate it. I can't even give the auhorship I worked so hard on. At the moment a kind of feel like a mediocre jack of all trades. I can debate pretty well, just not good enough to break finals. I can draw pretty well, but not well enough to get anything more than an honorable mention and scam commissioners. I'm pretty good at webdesign but not good enough to make a website i'm satisfied with. The problem is I don't want to specialize in anything, I want to do as many things as a can, but the consequence of that is not being as good as I want to be.

Overall the the weekend has been really nice. I got breakfast with some of my team members yesterday and got to have that feeling like people actually want me around. We leave for home tomorrow and I hope I can enjoy it, even if I didn't get to participate in the debating of my bill. Hopefully it comes up in atleast one more competition, and not in finals."

7-8-24

I've been doing pretty good mentally, so I'm doing some more work on this website. I'm working on a project that requires some interviews so I've been asking questions on tumblr. The article should be available in a week to two weeks time. I'm pretty proud of my self for going out and finding people to question. Some other projects are currently on the back burner so they should be done maybe by the end of the month. I've started doing commisions and have one currently in the works. I'm changing my terms of service because I was scammed a few weeks ago. Overall life has been life-ing but in a good way. I don't really know what people usually put in blogs, I might look through some other sites to see what I'm even supposed to put in this things.

6-20-24

I've been trying to get my self to do more activities outside of sitting on my phone. I hope that this website will help with that. I want to make blog post and maybe make a pic log. My mental health has been pretty good, my room is clean and I've been keeping up with meds. I've also started reading again. I finished 'The Scarlet Letter' and started on reading 'Jane Eyer'. I hope to be productive this summer and keep myself from doing nothing.